By Adam Grant
As anyone who has been called out for hypocrisy by a small child knows, kids are exquisitely attuned to gaps between what grown-ups say and what grown-ups do. If you survey American parents about what they want for their kids, more than 90 percent say one of their top priorities is that their children be caring. This makes sense: Kindness and concern for others are held as moral virtues in nearly every society and every major religion. But when you ask children what their parents want for them, 81 percent say their parents value achievement and happiness over caring.
ADAM GRANT is an organizational psychologist at the University of Pennsylvania’s Wharton School of Business. He is the author of Originals and Give and Take; a co-author of The Gift Inside the Box; and the host of TED’s WorkLife podcast.